Helen: Music 1

Lord Hawk and the Goldfish

Shining, swimming, living in the lake.

Jump in the air, 

Lord Hawk I wish to infatuate.

One day, my attentions are received,

As Lord Hawk swoops down to be with me.

Our days are filled with joyous fun,

As we dance together in the sun.

A fish may love a bird,

A bird may love a fish.

Where would their love live?

One day Lady Hawk came by.

I swam down low so I might hide.

She banned my attentions,

My gentle self stopped interactions.

I stayed and swayed and remained hidden low.

The sadness then began to show.

A fish may love a bird,

A bird may love a fish.

Where would their love live?

Still everyday, Lord Hawk flew by

My scales grew dull, I knew I'd die.

As the last scale began to lose it's luster,

I swam back up with all my muster.

Lord Hawk asked me why I had stayed away,

The truth of the matter I could never say.

A fish may love a bird,

A bird may love a fish.

Where would their love live?

Gold summer turned to winter frost.

Lord Hawk came by without a day lost.

I rested as the lake sat in freeze,

Waiting again to feel summer breeze.

By the time the ice began to crack,

Lord Hawk forgot and stopped coming back.

Again my scales began to gray,

I became statue until one day.

A fish may love a bird,

A bird may love a fish.

Where would their love live?

Maybe their love could blossom in the mist.

Helen: Revelation 9

She weaves her fingers through my hair, decorating and tucking away my hair to set it for my show.  She sings soothingly to me a new song about a fish that fell in love with a hawk.  Once she finishes my hair, she decorates my arms, ankles, neck, ears, and waist in bells and jewels from her collection.  I always bring her jewels back, and wearing them helps add to the show.
She kisses the top of my head when she's finished with her song and my preparations.  I wrap my arms around her neck lovingly whispering thanks in her ear before running off to eat before the performances begin.
Yes!  Pretzel waffles stuffed with sliced ham!  I can really pull through the day on this.
After polishing through my breakfast, I slowly make my way to the performance area.  No rush since I'm the final performance.  The brothers Ion and Nicu perform using poi.  Mala performs a sensuous routine with her ball python.  Boldo and his wife, Simza demonstrate throwing knives; Simza throws knives at the board behind Boldo as her performs various dexterous acts of upper body before they switch.  When they switch, Boldo throws blade-tipped cards as Simza bends and stretches.  I spot the tiny Zindelo, pulling patrons out for the appointments with Mommy Vedunny.  The price for her appointments during the performance are more costly and more time than not the patron buys another performance ticket to view what they might have missed.  Profit.
Finally, my turn has arrived.  I begin singing before I begin my way in my front of the audience, allowing the song to introduce me to them.  I sing the same song Mommy Vedunny sang to me this morning as my feet begin to pull my body into motion.  In the twists, dips, dives, and bends of both my voice and my body, I express the tale.  The joy of the love between Goldfish and Lord Hawk, the sadness between the two at Lady Hawk's disapproval and the judgment, and the disappointment of the Goldfish when Lord Hawk forgot about her after the winter freeze.

Helen: Revelation 8

Becoming Silent Siren, the tribunal allows me as contributor to the community but I'm still not part of it.  It does help my pull in that I'm more free to interact and engage with my audiences.  That's why I always perform last, so people don't expect the same amount of interactions from everyone and it seems right of the last performer I suppose.  Some post-performance guests are creepy; they want to be way more personal than I prefer.  The Romani won't protect me from these, I'm already impure in their eyes.  I found a song that works for those ones, it seems to make them take care of their own needs without them needing to touch me.
I knock on Mommy Vedunny's door.  I keep my items in her cart as it's the only safe place I know to store anything in the caravan.  She opens the door, her nostrils flaring noticeably with the golden hoop from her nose chained to her ear in two places by two chains.  Her milky, cataract eyes like birds eggs nesting in the wrinkles of her face.
"Latcho Mommy," I greet cheerfully.
"Latcho," her face brightens into a smile and she cups my face with her palms.  "Come in, let's get you ready for today."
I pull myself up the steps, she already has the incense burning within her cart this morning.  She's the seer so she cart has been sanctioned for gadjo entrance.  I've seen her read many things; stones, cards, palms, tea, bones, boards.  I don't know how she remembers it all.  In the back is my trunk.  I put on the sea foam colored harm pants with the matching embellished bra and scrounge to the bottom for the silver Isis wings.  I put my casual clothes back in the trunk and sit myself at Mommy Vedunny's feet.

Helen: Revelation 7

I awaken to the reality of the loneliness of my hammock bed in the performers caravan.  I don't know why I always have the same dream at least once a month.  Mommy Vedunny seems to think it a previous life or forgotten memories trying to be remembered.  I don't know how true it is, but in every performance I can't help but to scan the crowd for the faces of the Katan brothers.  If it was a previous life, would I still recognize them today?
Maybe I'll find them today when I perform my act as the Silent Siren.
I started the act as Silent Siren a few days after I first talked to Mommy Vedunny about the dreams.  Before that, I could only stay in Mommy Vedunny's caravan and only interact with Mommy Vedunny.  I'm still a gadji.  Outsider.  An impurity to the community.

Helen: Revelation 6

I don't know how long I was out for, but I can feel two hands laying atop my arm.  Alexiel's other hand is clasping mine, his forehead touching against mine.
"You really had us worried," Rosiel says quietly behind me as he runs his fingers lightly through my hair.
"I'm really sorry," I whisper back.  "I really don't know what I was thinking."
"You clearly weren't thinking," he whispers back and kisses my hair.  "But that's okay, we still love you Helen."
"I love you two," I smile as I lay between the two of them.  

Rosiel continues running his fingers through my hair while Alexiel runs his along my arm.  Their motions touch my not only in my heart, but down to my soul.  I am truly happy here between these two.  

Their comforting movements ease me off to sleep.

Helen: Revelation 5

My mask is swiftly removed from my face and replaced by stinging pain of a slap to my cheek.  I lose focus again from the blow and the tears of pain in my eyes.
"I didn't invite you out here tonight for you to enchant other men!" the voice berates me.
My ears suddenly catch something like a deep and full version of a paper bag being ripped apart and I see a dark blue figure atop the brown armchair.  A second dark blue figure appears crawling toward me, I back up into the railing as it wraps itself around me.
"If you wanted to go to a ball, you could have asked," Alexiel's soothing voice comes from the blue wrapped around me.
"Seriously!" Rosiel's familiar voice from the blue attacking the armchair, "What made you think following an anonymous invitation was safe?"
I bury myself deep into the safety of Alexiel's suit and let loose all of my tears, thankful the boys followed me out here tonight.   I hear scuffling sounds and Rosiel grunting about it not being his fault.  I pull myself from Alexiel's suit to see another form, must be security.
"Blue saved me from the man in brown!" I scream defensively for Rosiel.  "The man in brown spun me dizzy, pushed me in here, then attacked me!"
"She lies," the arm chair retorts. "We were having a wonderful evening until these boys came crashing in."
"Bull shit!" I spit as I point to the sore spot on my face.
I feel myself being pulled away from the scene entirely as the security figure and the arm chair leave.  Rosiel's blue form remains with me and I feel comforted in knowing that he's safe.  I collapse to the floor in Alexiel's comforting arms and find myself blacking out to the same words in two tones, one voice nurturing and the other snarky: she's overdone it.

Helen: Revelation 4

As we dance, I make idle chat.  He's a pharmaceutical representative in his early thirties with a wife and two beautiful children in Wisconsin.  He enjoys the unique experiences afforded to him by travel such as attending a masquerade.  I share with him some of the light details of my life; age, profession, and hometown.  As the song concludes, I thank him for the dance before moving along.
As I again make my way across the ballroom floor, hands grab both of my wrists from behind me.  I try to turn my head to view who has grabbed me but they elude my line of sight while pushing my arms to make me twist, turn and move.  I try to break free but am forced to continue moving with the music as my unknown puppeteer pilots me around and around.   I'm pushed through a thick velvet curtain as I catch myself on the balcony railing.  I'd love to take a deep breath of fresh air and regain myself, but still don't know who was behind me.  I swiftly spin around to view my manipulator but am thrown off balance from my own spin, collapsing to the floor.
The scene is spinning but I can pick out certain objects.  The burgundy curtain, the brown armchair, the white tile.
"Who was that you were dancing with?" The brown armchair asks.  Hm, not an armchair.  I've got to regain my focus.

Helen: Revelation 3

Stepping out of the cab, I start to feel silly leaving in a hurry like I did. Everyone else I see is fully covered in their Marie Antoinette gowns and masks while I'm barely contained in what I've got on.  I wrap an arm around myself trying to hide myself as I feel as though I stick out terribly. The glisten of sweat on my body kept my body from overheating during the show but now has me feeling chilly in the cool night breeze. Now I don't know if I'm rubbing my arm because of the chill or my lack of self-confidence.
Upon entering the hotel, the inside is speckled with other costumes as well as the popular trend of French Rococo.  Many of them men are wearing masks with the nose sculpted out as beaks. I haven't even the slightest idea where the grandfather clock might be here but I don't mind too much if I find it. I think I'll just enjoy my evening as I check-in at the kiosk for the masquerade. My name already has a pre-paid ticket, probably from my admirer. I should thank him if I happen to meet him.
I head to the bar to purchase a glass of champagne.  I can sip, observe, and float through the crowd rather than simply stand around foolishly by my lonesome.  Halfway to the bar, I am stopped by a rather tall gentlemen in a frankenstitch suit and a half-comedy/half-tragedy mask with the frankenstitch down the center for a dance.  Why not?  I am at a masquerade after all.

Helen: Revelation 2

I have been working with the Katan brothers for a little over three years. We've toured their magic show across several states and one out of country. There is little that the three of us don't know about each other. We know what facial cues mean how we are feeling and how to compensate for the other in a performance if we begin to feel under the weather.  I'd be lost without my boys in my life. 

There is a bouquet of closed tulips in various colors setting on the table. This is the first time I've seen anything like this in my dressing room.  The boys are the act and I'm just the gorgeous blonde assistant I think to myself as I tug on a corkscrew curl of hair only to blow it away.  I reach out to the card in the bouquet, curious to know what it could possibly say.

"You have a deep and profound beauty that emanates from your presence. Your eyes demonstrate wisdom and kindness. I would love if you were to give me the time this evening at The Enchanted Masquerade being held at The U.S. Grant at 10:00. I'll be waiting by the grandfather clock in a tan eye mask. I will understand if you don't show but won't deny being disappointed as well.

Patiently waiting, 

Antigone Cavalli"

Well shoot, that started fifteen minutes ago and I'm still in my white sequin leotard.  I could attach the floor-length feather train and throw on some elbow length white gloves but I'm still out a mask. I make a quick glance around the dressing room for anything that I could possibly borrow from a former show. I spot a simple white eye mask littered with small black spots.  I bring it down from the wall then race around gathering my other items as I put them on as I head out the door. The street is littered with taxis as people are slowly leaving the theater after our performance.  I jump into the first one and start heading towards my destination.

Helen: Revelation 1

"It's been a wonderful night! Stay beautiful San Diego!" Rosiel calls out to the crowd as he waves, other hand wrapped around my waist.
I boast my brightest smile and lean myself away from him artfully enough to look as though I'm simply giving one last dexterous display as the curtain drops before us.  Rosiel's nimble reflexes spin me back into his hip; he's smooth and quick as he repositions one hand to the base of my back and the other cupping my chin.
"Though no city we've been to yet can compare with your radiant beauty."
"You say the same thing after every show," I sigh, pushing myself away from him.
I don't have to push too hard, it is practically an after-show ritual from Rosiel.  He's not bad looking, his thin physique aid in the twists and contortions in the show but he has enough build in his upper body to easily lift me around the stage.  His personality isn't horrible either; he is witty and clever. I suppose the problem is in his approach. It is clear that he is attracted to me but he persists in such a direct manner that it borders on rude.  I lift the latch on the trap door and return the handsome smile shining from below me.
I extend my hand out to lift out Rosiel's twin brother, Alexiel. In looks, they are exactly the same down to how they trim their goatee.  Alexiel is different in his own ways though, his personality is more mild than that of Rosiel's.  I don't mind the affection demonstrated upon me by Alexiel, he is more subtle in his side glances paired with his bashful blushing.  His soft personality makes my heart feel light and airy that I turn my face away and blush in response to him as I retreat to the back dressing room.